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 Khao
San Rd Tour April 2006 |
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The
inimitable Marco Polo once said "to walk amongst
the travelers is to be but a fleeting breeze in
an Afghan storm". With this prose resonating around
us, the Southerners 2006 Khao San Torrrr was underway.
We were the fleeting breeze and that road, that
travelers Mecca that is Khao San, was our Afghan
storm. We were going to walk amongst the travelers.
Actually I made that quote up. Our Afghan storm
began at the Robin Hood in grand style. Never
has a more motley, and let's face it, brave, accumulation
of individuals gathered for what really is a rather
parlous adventure into the depths of backpacker
culture than on this day. There was Brown looking
like Pele after 20 years in Jamaica, Jacques in
a tea cosy, Steel with unspeakable hair for which
he was fined and a Goa inspired headband, Ham
looking like Chopper's younger English cousin,
the usual array of Red Bull singlets, wrist bands,
fishermans pants and headscarves, and Fatty and
Fabio featuring their normal dress complete with
bags that could fit a house strapped to their
backs.
So off we traipsed to the BTS. Happily, for the
second year in a row no one was pushed on to the
tracks so there were no delays. We alight at National
Stadium and like true travelers, haggle with the
tuk tuk boys for a 5 baht discount and settle
in for the ride. Races are on and at least 3 make
it on 2 wheels.
First stop is Gullivers. There's not much happening
so we create some action. Drinks are ordered and
the court is in session. As per the Rules of the
Tour, no imported drinks are allowed. We are backpackers
and too poor for that. This is fine when you are
drinking Singha beers but when it comes to fines
of Sangsom, its hardly ideal and visions of a
dog show begin to take shape. Notable fines include
Maddern who bought his full outfit 2 minutes earlier
on the street, Steel for his terrible hair, youngsters,
Fabio and Fatty, just for being youngsters and
the French boys for being French. After a few
good ones we emerge onto the street for some real
atmosphere. Its at this point we begin to realize
we are nothing but a bunch of epigones. We cannot
match the authentic backpacker for style and grace.
No amount of fake tattoos and fisherman's pants
will do it. But we get stuck in.
Bar #2 was a street side thing. Memory is hazy
but one doesn't forget the Cheers Beer chick who
reached her monthly quota in the two hours we
were there. Like any traveler we know a special
when we see it and two large bottle for 10 cents
or whatever it was needed to be dominated. The
more you drink the more you save. Indeed. We saved
a lot. Tarryn left her mark here with 16 orders
of tequila and Linda joined us at this point in
a top that wasn't to stay on long.
Warmed and lubricated and attracting our fair
share of stares we launched an assault on a rather
upmarket bar across the road whose name escapes
me right now. Now this is where things get really
hazy, especially for the author who pretty soon
got horizontal and at one stage almost fell over
the balcony. The party raged on despite him.
Well the memory well and truly runs out now but
the evidence suggests we made it the Irish bar
upstairs where the usual theatrics took place.
Basically we gave it stick. The court was out
of session completely by this stage so there was
nothing stopping us. On on…
See photos for more info. The author regrets that
he can't write on. Shakes brought on by 'The Fear'
which was the result of that night and disturbing
flashbacks spell the end.
But all in it was an absolute cracker. A slightly
different crowd with some ring-ins (and one baby)
provided a buzzing dynamic and once again, the
Southerners Khao San Tour was a raging success.
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